*Just A Little Note*

Dear person who this may concern, First off, I know you will never read this, even know that I am writing it. But I miss you like you will never know. Everytime I hear a song that reminds me of you I have to change the channel but then you are on my mind for the rest of my day. And there is never a day where I am not thinking about you. I miss all our crazy adventrues we used to have together and all our summer nights we spent together. It just doesn't seem right without you. When I'm awake at two in the morning...now I have no one to text and tell them how i'm feeling. You used to be the person..I couldn't imagaine my life without...but now that you are out of my life...It was good for awhile...then now I really want you back...I know that will proably never happen..but just in case I see you again in the futrue...I will proabaly run to you and give you the biggest hug ever...cause I miss you more then I can ever explain...I hope your life is going as planned...mine really hasn't but I have the good times...I hope you are enjoying the life that you are living...It was really hard to just leave you...one of the hardest things I ever had to do...and yes I balled my eyes out the whole way home after leaving you that night...I justed wanted to write this to get my feelings out...even though I know you will never see this..unless I tell you about....I miss you like crazy....And always will love you 5!!! <3
Sincerly, the girl who misses you lots <3

*Can't Sleep*

Right now I can't sleep...have so much on my mind...so thought I would post on here...since I haven't in forever. Well me and my supposed to be best friend got in a big fight and really over nothing. I think she is taking a way to far because she got all upset because I was telling her the truth...I just don't understand her sometimes...And before she has yelled at me out of no where and I don't understand why I can't do the same to her...not that I would want to or anything...it just aggravates me...cause I doubt we will ever be friends again..and I tried being the bigger person and texting her and trying to work things out but she don't want too but whatever anymore ....I am to the point in life...where I just stop caring and just live life....and then I posted a status on Facebook about ready for august so I can get outta here and live it up with my Chicago friends or something and she texted me and told me that we were done and she was sorry she couldn't be good enough as the people in Chicago and you know that was actually not pointed toward her and i understanding we are fighting and everything...but every status I post of Facebook while we are fighting is not toward her.....but I might be losing a friends...but I guess its a friend that never really cared anyway....so then there is this guy that I am always thinking about....he's my ex and we dated for a month and a half this summer but were partially dating before that...but we ended up breaking up while I was at camp and it just became too much for me to handle and idk just didn't want it to hurt me anymore...so I broke up with him...then when I got home from camp we talked but not much...until the beginning of August and we hung out  a few times and ended up dating again...but it didn't feel like anything was different....so then we ended up saying it wasn't right but we would still be friends so we stayed friends but we would hang out and hanging out with someone you still have feelings for leads to something more...so everytime we hung out even just as friends we ended up kissing and just made me want a realsiosnhip again with him...and then I knew I wasn't going to get it and I needed to move on...I told him one day that I needed to take myself away from him....so I did I deleted his number out of my phone..deleted him off facebook...teared up pictures....everything...I was done...but now I realized he was my best friend and I kinda made a mistake that now I lost the person who knew secrets that even some of my other best friend's I have known longer have not known...but I have stayed true to myself and have not contacted him or nothing...ya I have thought a lot about him.....a lot of stuff reminds me of him...but I know it will be better in the end...so that's what is what is best....but I better get some sleep....night everyone.........:( One week for sure

Just one of them days!!!

Oh I just wish everyone was treated fairly... I just hate how people pick favorites! I just really hate being stressed out.... Really wish school was done and over with already!!! Can't wait to get out that place!!! :( Sometimes I wish life wasn't this hard... But i guess I will learn from it in the future!!! :/ so that's been my day!!!

Homecoming Week!!!

So this week has been awesome because it's homecoming and who doesn't love homecoming!!! I love it!!! I think it's the best part of the year... You get to dress up and be goffy along with the rest of the people in the school. It's so much fun!!! But I think I don't like about homecoming week Is float building because my class is dumb and we don't have people that show up to help so it just goes bad..it's stressful.. But tonight was pink night for volleyball which is where we raise money for breast canaer and this year it was aganist erie(our biggest rivals) and it was pretty much amazing.. We had the cheering sections battling it out.. While we didn't win, it was still a lot of fun... And we all went out on the floor after the game and broke it down as panthers, that's why I love our school!! Then the parade tomorrow night and football game Friday then dance saturday!!! So exciting can't wait!!!! :) well I should probably get done sleep, so night everyone! <3 :)

First College Visit :)

So today I went to western Illinois university for a college visit. It was very over welling with all the information that they were giving me all at once. But I really liked the campus, I just don't know if I want to go to a college that is that big. But I loved the edcaution major progam, just hope I get accapted. And I have other schools I want to look at. I just don't know where I want to go yet. But I better get on that so I can start applying. I just hope I don't get in
to college and take hard classes and fail. And I hope I would like living on campus. Well I better get some sleep, so night. :)

*Monday July 18, 2011-Day 23 of LSM*

It's so sad!!! This is the last Monday at LSM this year!!! It is so sad. I hate it!!! I wish that I could never leave this place. I love it here!!! I wish all the people lived in one area, cause it sucks to be all spread out then you can't see each other during the year!!!! :( Well me and Karina live pretty close, so we will probably see each other during the year!!!! But today has been hard because I have been so tired!!! I didn't go to bed till midnight last night because me and Adele were up talking about life!! And I just can't take my mind off the whole Joey thing. I wish we weren't separated this long, but it's whatever anymore. It happened, it's over. I saw it coming eventually anyway. Then Band was amazing today!!! We were in the CFL and Rahab sounded amazing!!!! LOVED it!!!!! Can't wait for the concert!!! Then this afternoon I had my lesson which went pretty well. I have some stuff to work on and just put the final touches on my solo. So I guess all my hard work has paid off. And then I talked to Vicki, she said she was going good, but she is still in quite a bit of pain, but not as much as before. Then I talked to mom and seen how hte weather was there, same as here, hot as ever!!! I think like 105 degrees!!! It's crazy!!! I am going to be so sad, when I leave here, cause I'm going to miss all the people and music and just the experience. I would really love to come back next year, but we will see how everything goes, and see if it works out or not. But I am kind of excited to go home and see everyone and stuff, but it's o.k. I will miss this more!!! I love this place and wouldn't be the person I am today without LSM. I love it a lot!!!!! And everyone thinks I'm crazy about going away for a month to a camp just to play music. But I tell them no I'm not, because it's so awesome you don't understand!!! This is a once in a life time experience. That is totally amazing. If I never have come here, I would I not be he person I am today at all!!!!

 Me and Karina Day 23

 My toes with green underneath and blue crackle on top!!!! Amazing!!!!! Karina got it in the mall form her aunt!!! :)

Me and Maryanne!!!!!! Oh how I miss you!!!!! :)

*Sunday July 17, 2011-Day 22 of LSM*

Well the student recital on Friday was amazing. Then I could not fall asleep. But it's' OK. I made it through Saturday.The talent show and dance was amazing last night. I went crazy and everyone accepted that. I love it!!!!!!!! Then I didn't go to bed till late!!! So I was really tired today!! But I got though it. Me and Karina went to the pool today because it was so hot!!! Like 100 degrees no joke!!! Oh well then there was meetings about groups to do stuff for festival week. Then dinner was good. I had a wrap, pizza and a salad. Awesome!!!! Oh they had chicken nuggets for lunch today!!! So exciting!!!! LOL!!!! Then the recital was amazing like always. ad now I am going to bed!!!! TTYL!!!

 Me and Karina Day 22

 Pool :)

 Me and Marissa!!!!! Waiting for service group meeting to start!!! :) <3

Me and Karina at the pool!!!!!! :) Love this girl to death!!!!!!!! <3